September 20, 2011

New Mom Advice and Instructions: Tub-Full Tuesday

People who are willing to pass on knowledge to help others fill my tub. I've often posted about the generosity of the writing community, but there's another wonderful group who live to give... mothers. I've yet to meet a mom who wasn't terrified to leave the hospital with her first baby. I know I personally questioned the sanity of the nurse who signed my exit papers. What did I know about this little person?

My gut sent me running to my mom. She was unbelievable, so patient with all my questions. But she didn't live close by. I learn by watching, and I needed to surround myself with other women figuring it out. I needed new mom advice and camaraderie.

One of my first Mommy-friends suggested a book I adore to this day, Anne Lamott's Operating Instructions: A Journal of my Son's First Year. She didn't hold back any of her fears. I was so tired with a newborn, but devoured this book in one evening. I laughed and appreciated the author's raw honesty about tackling the unknown beast of motherhood. Truly some of the best new mom advice I've ever received. At the core, we have to believe in ourselves and embrace our struggles and thoughts. The biggest defeat a mom can have is trying too hard to be perfect, it's simply unattainable.

When I was querying my fellow moms about whether to have a third kid or not, a handful were truly honest. I so appreciated it, and I spread the love. I tell other moms all the time that they will inevitably love and cherish a new life, but they should consider the effort of different personalities, needs, wants and energies. It's a commitment, and one not to be taken lightly.

A huge thank you to all my mom friends who constantly fill my tub and help me be a better mother and woman.

Today, my mom and I are featured on, a wonderful site for mothers. I love their slogan... real moms. real life. Please take a moment to checkout their site and our interview.

What is the best real advice a mother ever gave you?


Sandwiched Writer said...

As a mother and a daughter, I love to see both writing together! I've tagged you for The Versatile Writer Award. If you'd like to participate, check out my recent post!

Jessica Therrien said...

Tia, thanks for visiting my blog :)
Some of the best advice my mother gave me was to do what I love...and so I write. Congrats to you on your interview! PS, my sister is due in a month and has a two-year-old...yikes. She needs all the advice she can get!

Nadja Notariani said...

Hi Tia!

It was so nice to hear from you today. My left handed 'tid-bit' was more of a hit than I ever expected. See...I hit a great topic...and all because I'm left-handed! Ha!

My mom was (and is) always full of great advice. Some of the things she's said that proved to be the best advice...
1. You've got a mouth, use it.
2. This, too, shall pass.
3. Go for it. What have you got to lose?
4. If you must suffer, please suffer quietly where I don't have to look at it. (This one sounds harsh to many people, but really, this may be the best 'character-building' statement ever! My mom is a firm believer that if you wallow in misery, you'll be miserable. Simple as that. It's all about perspective! Forget your own sadness - that's too much self-focus. Focus on happiness, even if you have to look at someone else's happiness today (if you're having a bad day) and pretty soon, you'll be happy, too. ) ~ Nadja

Deniz Bevan said...

A great post! My sister's newly pregnant, I'll pass her the link right away :-)

Tia Bach said...

Nadja, Great advice!

Deniz, Hope your sister finds it helpful.

Jessica, Thanks. Good luck to your sister. My first two girls are 20 months apart. ;-)

And, yeah, an award. Thanks so much!

Thanks everyone for commenting.